The Night I Stopped Chasing
Every time Reese pulls away, I fight to keep us alive. The first night I stop, they come back, and I finally see what we have been calling love
Reese only wants me when I stop wanting them.
For three days, they disappear.
Tonight, I finally stop reaching.
At 11:42, someone knocks.
Reese is standing outside my door.
“I thought you were done with me.”
They sound hurt, like I am the one who left.
Reese leaves without asking me to follow.
The door closes.
My phone lights up with an old voice note I forgot I saved.
Six months ago, Reese sounded exactly like this.
“I just need time.”
“I do not want to lose you.”
“I just do not know what I want.”
I stare at the date.
Different night.
Same words.
Then I notice what always came next.
I was always the one who made staying easier than choosing me.
My phone lights up.
Sage sent me a screenshot from six months ago.
It is something I wrote the last time Reese came back.
“I do not even know if I want this anymore.”
My stomach drops.
There is one more line.
“I just needed them to choose me again.”
I read it twice.
Reese pulls away when I get close.
I chase when Reese pulls away.
We have both been calling the fear of losing each other love.
Reese looks at me.
“If I stop asking you to stay, will you still choose me?”
For once, I do not know.
And somehow, that feels more honest than every time I said yes.
I thought letting go meant losing Reese.
I never realized I was the one I kept leaving behind.